The game that can give you 10 extra years of life

The twin sister to Kelly McGonigal

The top five regrets of the dying.

Number one: I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

Number two: I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Number three: I wish I had let myself be happier.

Number four: I wish I’d had the courage to express my true self.

And number five: I wish I’d lived a life true to my dreams, instead of what others expected of me.

 

Here are the top five things that people with post-traumatic growth say “My priorities have changed”:

“I’m not afraid to do what makes me happy.”

“I feel closer to my friends and family.”

“I understand myself better. I know who I really am now.”

“I have a new sense of meaning and purpose in my life.”

“I’m better able to focus on my goals and dreams.”

 

Now, does this sound familiar? It should, because the top five traits of post-traumatic growth are essentially the direct opposite of the top five regrets of the dying. Now this is interesting, right? It seems that somehow, a traumatic event can unlock our ability to lead a life with fewer regrets.

 

But how does it work? How do you get from trauma to growth? Or better yet, is there a way to get all the benefits of post-traumatic growth without the trauma, without having to hit your head in the first place? That would be good, right?

Four kinds of resilience:

1.  Physical resilience.

2. Mental resilience.

3. Emotional resilience.

4 . Social resilience.

‘Live long and prosper’ is an abbreviated version of a traditional Jewish religious blessing. It came to a wider public in the Star Trek TV series. It was used there by the character Mr. Spock (actor Leonard Nimoy, himself Jewish) as the greeting of the Vulcan people.

Live long and prosper.

How to make stress your friend

Grandfather (Stalking Wolf) had it right – BELIEF is most important in your life.
Part of transcript (listen to it all!):

01:21

Let me start with the study that made me rethink my whole approach to stress. This study tracked 30,000 adults in the United States for eight years, and they started by asking people, “How much stress have you experienced in the last year?” They also asked, “Do you Believe that stress is harmful for your health?” And then they used public death records to find out who died.

 01:48

(Laughter)

 01:49

Okay. Some bad news first. People who experienced a lot of stress in the previous year had a 43 percent increased risk of dying. But that was only true for the people who also believed that stress is harmful for your health.

 02:08

(Laughter)

 02:10

People who experienced a lot of stress but did not view stress as harmful were no more likely to die. In fact, they had the lowest risk of dying of anyone in the study, including people who had relatively little stress.

 02:24

Now the researchers estimated that over the eight years they were tracking deaths, 182,000 Americans died prematurely, not from stress, but from the Belief that stress is bad for you.

 02:37

(Laughter)

  02:38

That is over 20,000 deaths a year. Now, if that estimate is correct, that would make believing stress is bad for you the 15th largest cause of death in the United States last year, killing more people than skin cancer, HIV/AIDS and homicide.

02:57

(Laughter)

 02:59

You can see why this study freaked me out. Here I’ve been spending so much energy telling people stress is bad for your health.

 03:09

So this study got me wondering: Can changing how you think about stress make you healthier? And here the science says YES. When you change your mind about stress, you can change your body’s response to stress.

The three powers words of the English language

The three powers words of the English language

YES, NO, and WOW (Wonder of Wonders).

Mat 5:37  “But let your* word be, ‘Yes, Yes’ [or] ‘No, No,’ but the [word which is] more [than] these is from the evil [one].

What do these three have in common?

They are all complete sentences by themselves and they are the irreducible lowest form of all choices.

YES means I want that in my life.

NO means I do not want that in my life.

WOW means I open myself to all that life has to offer. From the opening page of my blog “If the doors of perception were cleansed every thing would appear to man as it is, Infinite. For man has closed himself up, till he sees all things thro’ narrow chinks of his cavern.  William Blake, The Marriage of Heaven and Hell”

WOW is the choice to try and see everything as interconnected.

WOW is the choice to try and see rightly. One purpose in life is not to set things right, but to see them rightly.

We will use things rightly if we see things rightly.

But how do you see things rightly? You have heard the saying “seeing is believing”; I think we have it backward “believing is seeing”. When you first enter this world “seeing is believing”, but after you have built up your set of assumptions, concepts, values, and practices then “believing is seeing”. First you build your beliefs, then you filter what you see through them. You have programmed the way you view reality and have allowed others to program the way you view reality. In order to see things rightly you need to change your paradigm, your way of viewing reality. Your paradigm is your set of assumptions, concepts, values, and practices that have been imprinted on your subconscious mind.

If you want to make small changes in your life change one behavior at a time. If you want to make large changes in your life change your paradigm (your way of viewing reality).

Let’s take a quick look at some opposing filters of your perception:

objective—————-subjective

tolerance—————-dominance

acceptance————–judgement

preferences————–addictions

love———————–fear

The more conviction behind the filter the more it changes what you perceive you see. These filters can also affect how you react to events that spring up in your life.

Choice (in every event in our lives there is a moment to determine the direction that we will grow toward or that the event will shape us toward) simply put; choice is practice.

I believe our paradigm is built by the habituation of our choices.

Ancient Mystics believed that habituation should occur for at least 1 Lunar Cycle to make the paradigm shift permanent in the subconscious mind.

Can you see how changing your paradigm: your set of assumptions, concepts, values, and practices would be more effective in changing your life than changing behaviors one at a time?

This is why we read good books, listen to good talks, discuss our discoveries with other free thinkers, and choose to practice good things that we discover.